:::throws confetti in the air:::

Today officially marks the day that I enter my third and last trimester!!!

I see my new doctor on the 7th and I hope she confirms that "medically" I'm as healthy as I feel. Perhaps it's because I felt so icky with the puking for so long, but I'm totally enjoying this part of being pregnant! Aside from a few occasional painful leg cramps, and some minor back discomfort, I might just be the freaking picture of pregnancy health.

Jack is moving around a TON these days, and still seems to respond the most when we're watching something with action. Last night we were lying in bed and Troy was watching Planet Earth. I wasn't watching the TV but could feel Jack moving around like a fiend. I asked Troy if a cheetah was chasing something or something suspenseful was about to happen because "JB" (as my father-in-law calls him) was going to crazy. Even if we didn't have an ultrasound to confirm this kiddo was a boy, just his love of action movies would have given it away for me.

Goonie has a name, and I'm living like a refugee

I am proud to announce that Mr. Goonie finally has a name! Ladies and Gentleman, as of now, Goonie is officially "Jack Barry (last name)". Jack after my dad, and Barry after Troy's dad. We are blessed to have such awesome men in our lives to name our little guy after! We asked them both for Christmas if we could use them as a namesake, and I dare say both were quite pleased.

As of now, Troy and I are still living like refugees in his parent's house. They're absolutely amazing and so fun to hang out with, but it's time for us to have our own place...you know since we actually do pay rent on a freaking apartment!

The city still hasn't reopened the hill to our new place, but the road is technically driveable. Our moving truck is somewhere in Portland and we'll hopefully get it Tuesday at the latest (fingers freaking crossed). Our new bed and couch are another matter...

We were at the apartment yesterday for our scheduled delivery from Macy's of our brand spanking new (and quite expensive...argh) bed and couch. The driver tried to pull in to our driveway ONCE, decided it was too hard and chose to drive away with my furniture in his truck. I was in tears because I'm so frustrated about the lack of movement with our stuff! I know stuff isn't everything, but at least with our bed, we could actually physically live in our new apartment. Please keep us in your thoughts that we'll get our stuff before this kid is born!

And on another note, Christmas was absolutely amazing. We spent the morning with Troy's family, and the afternoon at my sister's. It's so nice to be home with our family and able to enjoy the holidays with them.

Much delayed belly photo

Let's call this one the 25/26 week belly pix. Taken tonight in front of my amazing in-law's tree tonight after a delicious dinner of chicken and dumplings...mmmm cold weather comfort food!

So apparently I'm preparing for labor in my sleep

Troy said that the first night we were staying in a hotel on our road trip I yelled out something totally that didn't make sense. When he asked me why I was screaming I apparently said "I'm getting ready to freaking pop the baby out".

Even in my sleep, I'm super classy.

What our drive home, and Harry Potter have in common...

...both have characteristics that are never to be spoken of or mentioned again. I won't go in to the details, but it took us 4 days to get home for what is ordinarily an 18 hr drive. And anyone who knows my level of patience knows that I was sooooo loving that. NOT.

We're home safely, but are currently stay with Troy's parents because 1) the city closed the hill to our new apartment 2) Macy's couldn't deliver our new bed because of the weather and 3) our moving truck is delayed until early next week because of the weather...

We're snuggled in at Troy's parents so it could be much much worse. Plus we had all the Christmas presents in the cars with us so we're very thankful that if everyone can celebrate Christmas together, we at least have their gifts!

(The inlaws driveway)

Trip details

We're leaving LA today around noon (fingers crossed). Because of the horrible weather in Oregon and southwest Washington on I-5, we're making alternate plans.

We're headed up I-5 and will hop over to the 580 and stay in San Francisco tonight with a friend that I work with. Tomorrow we'll get on the 101 and head up the coast to avoid any weather hazards.

Because the 101 is much slower and takes a lot longer, we probably won't roll in to home until Friday ish.

Please keep us in your prayers for a safe journey!

A random clusterfuck of a post

Today is moving day! The truck has been delivered and the movers come around 2 pm to pack us up. Here is a small list of things that I won't miss about Los Angeles:

• the fact that our 1940's apartment was built without insulation or double paned windows. I love the charm of our apartment, but not that it was 46 degrees INSIDE this morning when we woke up. Also, it rained yesterday and shorted out our breaker box leaving us without overhead lighting and only 2 working outlets in pretty much the whole apartment. The electrician couldn't come until this morning, so we've had my grandmother's very lovely table lamp in our bathroom so that we can pee and shower with some sort of light.
• the fact that despite living in a REALLY good neighborhood, we woke up this morning to realize that someone had stolen our freaking rope that Troy used to rope off a spot on the street for the moving truck to park. Yes, seriously, they stole a 15 ft piece of rope.
• the fact that our methhead neighbor's gardener stuck his head in our open front door this morning while I was alone in the apartment, looked right at me and said "I here for lady". Turns out he was looking for Lady McMeth next door, and she told him she was in our backyard. Ok, why don't you go buy some more Sudafed and car battery you crazy hosebeast.
• the fact that the cable guy just came and picked up my Tivo and we're not leaving until tomorrow morning. I'm near hyperventilation stage. I guess I didn't realize how much I love me some TV.
• the fact that one day when Troy and I were on the beach I offered a homeless guy a sandwich and he asked me: 1) what kind it was (internal thoughts: it's the fucking free kind buddy) 2) if it was dolphin safe after he found out it was tuna, 3) if it was made with vegan mayo, and 4) if I would give him my chips and soda.
• the fact that another homeless man was jacking off in a sleeping bag outside my car one morning when Troy and I went to our favorite breakfast place
• the fact that garbage day starts at 6 am and lasts until 10 am, and I'm fairly certain the sanitation department refuses to oil the trucks just to fuck with us. It's like the gates of hell are opening on garbage day - it's that freaking loud
• the fact that when you call a store and ask to be transferred to another department the person informs you that "I don't speak English" or "I don't know how to use the phone" and just hangs up. (Culver City Target and Costco).
• there are more reasons, but I thought you guys would enjoy these.

I won't miss Los Angeles, but I will miss the amazing friends I have made here. I'll be back in a few weeks for work, but not seeing these people everyday really hurts.

Week 24 belly!

There I am in all my pajama glory this morning.

For Stephanie

So a great friend at work asked me today when I'm going to update my blog...Steph this is for you! =D

I had a shower at work yesterday, and it was fantastic! My company truly knows that to celebrate new babies, you need 3 things: great friends, a fun atmosphere, and bacon!!! It was a breakfast shower and everything was perfect. My co-workers were beyond generous and we received a giftcard to Babies R Us. I'm going to hang on to it for now and use it for after I have another shower (if I have another shower). That way I can figure out and get what we REALLY need, since people only like to buy the cute stuff.

I had an appointment on Monday and I have gained 5 lbs since my last visit 4 weeks ago. I just weighed myself on the scale at work, and I'm 150 lbs which means I have OFFICIALLY surpassed my starting weight! Looks like it's time to start dieting or smoking...I don't want to give birth to a fatty (I'm KIDDING MOM).

I'll do my best to post a belly photo tonight, but in the blur of packing our apartment, our camera cord seems to have been packed somewhere already. I'll go ghetto belly shot style and do it with my camera phone, but the quality could potentially suck.

14 days until Christmas everyone, hope you're all well and planning on spending time with your families.

C-R-E-E-P-Y

So I'm laying in bed last night and all the sudden I feel the Goonie's HAND in the lower left side of my abdomen. Until now he's been doing random jabs and kicks, but this was the first time I felt like I just knew it was his hand...almost like he was trying to give me a high five for consuming that delicious steak last night. You're welcome my son, you're welcome.

And for the record, it didn't look like this:

So THAT is what a baby bump looks like...

I was wondering when that would show up...

And please don't hate on my awesome orange shirt. I bought that from Goodwill for $.25 10 years ago, and it is still one of my favorite "around the house" shirts. It has a cartoon tiger on it and says 'Tigers". It is threadbare and I will cry when it officially falls apart.

The scale at work says 146.5 so I'm only 1.5 lbs away from my starting weight. I feel that I'm on the upward swing of weight gain and will start officially looking pregnant soon! People at work no longer say I look "tired" all the time which I assume means my Skeletor-like appearance has diminished some. What you get when you Google "Skeletor":

Pants getting tight...

At almost 23 weeks pregnant, some of my work pants are finally getting to the point where I feel knocked up and not like an impostor. Buttoning my work pants this morning, I actually had to suck it in a bit to put them on. My jeans still fit fine, but I've moved from the 3rd to the 2nd hole in my belt.

It could be the delicious Thanksgiving feast I ate, or the fact that food has flavor once again. Troy says I still eat like a bird (small meals here and there), but at least I'm retaining the food! I weighed myself this am, and an up to 145.5 lbs, so only 2.5 lbs away from my starting weight!

It was so fantastic being home for Thanksgiving with all of our family. We were only there for a short time, but it was so hard to get back on the plane and come back to Los Angeles (even though it was butt ass cold up in Seattle).

****UPDATE 1:30 pm****
I just had a delicious burger and fries and am sitting at my desk with my pants unbuttoned hiding underneath my shirt; first time EVER I've had to resort to that. I'm also currently fighting a wicked case of "food coma" (it's real...). I might need to get up and do some laps soon.

My plea to Christian Slater

Dear Christian Slater,

Your forehead scares the SHIT out of me. You're like 45, and can't move your face above your eyes. I'm truly scared for you...injecting that much Botox in to your forehead can't be good for your health or your need to appear like you're both evil and scared on "My Own Worst Enemy".

And BTW, for a show that is sold as "the male Alias", I gotta say, I am BORED. I continue to Tivo you and your wrinkle-free face, but will only watch it once I've cleared out the List on my Tivo. I once couldn't sleep and spent about 5 minutes watching your show at 2 am before choosing to READ. You read that right buddy, you drove me to a book in the week hours of the morning.

For what it's worth, you were fantastic in Heathers, and kind of good in Prince of Thieves, but I'm not seeing it anymore. Sorry bud.

xoxo,
Sarah

Week 21

21 weeks; I'm more than halfway now - who hoo!!! In the belly pix, I'm wearing MATERNITY JEANS! They're really baggy still, but when before they would just fall off, now they stay up for 5 minutes before slipping down.

I weighed myself today and I'm at 144.5 lbs which means I'm only 3.5 lbs away from my starting weight! I've begun drinking 1 Ensure a day - basically an old person drink but it tastes good (well only the milk chocolate milkshake does), has 250 calories and 24 "essential" vitamins and minerals. I'm thinking of starting to drink 2 a day, but those suckers are expensive! A person at work today (who was trying to be very sweet) told me that when actors have to gain weight for a role, they will microwave a gallon of ice cream and drink it...and drink 5 of those a day. He meant well, but I gagged thinking about it.

We have another doctor appointment tomorrow - a scheduled check up every 4 weeks. It's different than the one last week which was the 20 week ultrasound with a specialty doc to make sure Goon is growing properly, etc.

And on another note, only 6 more days until we get to go home to Washington for Thanksgiving - can't freaking wait! We haven't seen most of our family since May when we were home for cousin Kami's wedding. It's going to be a short visit, but so great: fun, family, food, family, and more food. I'm literally dreaming about my favorite pork fried rice at China West Restaurant.

The world is on fire, I look like my father & pizza face comments from strangers

Pretty much all of Los Angeles is on fire right now - there is one about 30 miles to the north of us, 70 miles to the north of us, and 45 miles to the south of us. The skies are very hazy and when you can see the sun it looks like the whole sky is also ablaze. The poor families that are losing their homes and having to deal with this!

Our apartment is old and drafty, and ash is getting in to our little house even with the doors and windows closed. I was grocery shopping and it looked like it was snowing ash! My eyes and throat are burning - I can only imagine how people who are living closer to the fires are feeling.

So it's common knowledge in my family that from birth to about the age of 5, my sister looked just like my dad. Well, thanks to pregnancy, I now look like my dad too! I was plucking my eyebrows with a magnifying mirror and turned it to catch the sun and HOLY FUCK what is that? It was a beard. I have a beard. Thanks to pregnancy hormones, I have this blond peach fuzz along my jaw line. Ok...awesome!

Yesterday I was getting a pedicure and a woman came in to the shop and was trying to sell everyone some fancy medical water. I put my book up to my face and did my best to not even look at her. She came over and asked me what kind of water I currently drink, etc. I said I drink filtered tap and wasn't interested in her product. She pointed to her face and made a circular motion around her face with her finger and said "how long have you had those issues". I was FUMING - who in the hell are you to call me out for being zitty you f'ing bitch? For what it's worth your pants were too tight and you had a camel toe skank.

I told her the was because I was pregnant and had nothing to do with my water. She then said "your baby deserves the best water possible". I said that I would drink whatever my DOCTOR told me to, and if she would like to recommend something else to me I would need to see her medical license.

If my toenails hadn't been wet at that moment, I would have stuck my foot so far up her ass that she would need her own special water to recover.

Week 20

Here's the belly photo! The pants are unbuttoned to show off the belly - not cause I walk around with my pants unzipped.

I've gained .5 lbs since Monday so now I'm only 4.5 away from my starting weight. Sweet!

Well, not only is "it" a he, but he's a perv!

Today at our ultrasound, we received confirmation that Goonie is for sure a boy, and not a lady Goonie. The u/s tech put the wand on my belly and within about 3 secs Goonie was showing us his goods. I guess most babies are pretty squirmy, but he was quite the show off.

She took lots of measurements and everything is right on track! Despite still being 5 lbs under my starting weight, the kiddo is progressing well, and is even measuring about a week ahead. What a smart little overachiever he is!!!

The tech switched the machine to "4D" and said "oh look, there is his penis". Being the true child of Troy and myself, Goonie chose that moment to look at the camera, spread his legs, and give us the thumbs up:

Ah, momma's little perv.

Troy and I are still batting around a few names, but we think we're 99% set on one. Troy is working to make sure he's that extra 1% certain and we'll reveal it then!

We're registering tomorrow at my lunch break. I'm purposefully keeping the trip short so that we don't get overwhelmed and scan 6,000 items. I've been doing research for months (shocker right, I HATE being prepared...) and have set up a wish list that we'll convert to a registry tomorrow. I just didn't want to read about stuff and forget about it so the wish list has been my "shopping list" for months.

My awesome baby momma Anne found the most adorable sheets for us yesterday. We're not really doing a "theme" in the nursery, but are using the adorable yarn animals that my friend Jennifer made us a while ago as inspiration. I purchased the sheet and crib skirt yesterday (because they were on a wicked (40-60% off) sale!!!! but am not getting the bumper as freaking cute as it is. There is research showing that infants should sleep with NOTHING in the crib including a bumper to prevent SIDS.

Well BALLS

After 2 weeks of feeling fantastic, I threw up again at work today. Boo, hiss!

I'm going to attribute it to lack of sleep last night, and am treating this as a one time thing ONLY. I think Goonie just wanted to give me a little reminder that we've reached the halfway point today. He/she is so giving!

Pantry Challenge update & $160 for CRAP?

Pantry challenge update: Yesterday Troy made a tasty (albeit protein free) dinner from the pantry and freezer. We had rice, corn, and delicious onion potatoes that he made using week old baby red potatoes with some Lipton onion soup mix that neither of us knew we had. For a special treat, we had Trader Joe's "no pudge brownies" using a box of brownie mix that mysteriously appeared and some Fage yogurt in the fridge that was set to expire soon. He also fished out a can of pineapple juice from the freezer that had been hiding for a bit and mixed it with sparkly water for a delicious mocktail! I give him an A+ for effort and tastiness.

Tonight we're having chili with a random box of cornbread mix we found yesterday while hunting for powdered sugar. I'll probably cut up some carrot sticks for veggies.

I found a chicken breast in the freezer, and will be making some chicken noodle soup this week with a half empty bag of egg noodles, some miscellaneous chicken broth, and lots of veggies we need to use up in the fridge.

In eating news: this just in...food rocks! I had a giant breakfast on Saturday (the amount of food I would eat in a whole day during weeks 8-18), and then a big lunch. Food = awesome.

In other news, Troy had a garage sale this weekend to get rid of some crap (literally, just random junk that we didn't think anyone would possibly want) and made $160!!!! Just to prove that this stuff was actual crap, he sold a giant box of VHS tapes to a family for $30. Another guy bought a box of old batteries for $1. WTF!?

We have our big 20 week gender decider (coughit'saboycough) ultrasound on Wednesday morning! I'll post an update that evening along with a belly photo. I'm interested to see what the ultrasound shows because I got stung by a bee this weekend. Now my friend Anne (Baby Momma) is convinced that the Goonie will have super "Yellow Jacket" powers. If we see a pupa sac on Wednesday, there might be some cause for concern...=D

Join us in the "2008 Pantry Challenge"

Troy and I are starting the "2008 Fall Pantry Challenge" this week. We have way too much food in our pantry that will just go to waste soon since we've forgotten about it.

The Pantry Challenge, challenges us to create 2 meals a week between now and Dec 15th based almost solely on the contents of our pantry. You can of course supplement with fresh ingredients like eggs, dairy, meat, veggies, etc, but we have to clean out this pantry!

We start this week, and I encourage any of you with overflowing cupboards to join us and post comments about your "delicious and creative meals"!

The Goonie moved!

The Goonie moved today! Well to be clear, he(she) moves a lot (per our ultrasound viewing), but today is the first time I felt it.

I'm watching a friend's dog this weekend and felt the Goonie rollin' around when I was letting the pup out to pee. I thought it was the Goonie but wasn't sure. Later at the movies, there was a 10 minute action sequence and the kid tried to reenact the whole thing in my uterus. His(her) acting isn't the best, but the rolling and karate chops were right on.

Now, both the Goonie and I are looking forward to Quantum of Solace - the new James Bond movie on November 14th!

6:30 pm UPDATE: A Quantum of Solace of preview came on, and the kid started freaking out! I freaking love this kid because he's/she's cool and likes James Bond.

Toilet Bowl Anonymous

Hi my name is Sarah. I've now been clean for over 10 days, and I'm proud of my sobriety.

It started innocently enough - I'd throw up when I was nauseous, but then soon I couldn't get enough of it and was "sniffing the toilet water" 2, 3, maybe even 4 times a day. It got to the point where it didn't matter where I was: Target, work, home, I would have to sniff the toilet water when the craving hit. This went on for 14, 15 weeks and no one batted an eye.

Except for a stomach flu last week, I've been clean for 10 days and couldn't feel better. My appetite is coming back, and hopefully the weight will soon. My family is starting to talk to me again, and I can focus on work. I'm like a new woman.

"Thank you Toilet Bowl Anonymous for helping me kick this".

Week 18 - back from the brink of death & Halloween!

We survived the plague - hurray!

Week 18 stats

Pounds gained to date: -10. I gained a bit over the weekend but the butt flu took that all away. But, around 10 am this morning I had this strange sensation in my stomach. It took me a few minutes to place it, but I was HUNGRY! I haven't been hungry in 14 weeks.

Weeks until my next appointment: 2

*note on the photo, that is a shadow in my armpit - I don't have hairy pits people.

Feeling good, so I won't even measure it on a scale of 1-10.

We also had my Halloween party at work today, and dressed up as Juno and her baby daddy Beeker from the movie "Juno". My wig isn't great, but Troy's costume MAKES our "group" costume. You can't see, but I'm wearing jeans under that skirt, and Troy is wearing some awesome knee socks:

The devil is gone from this house!

We're both recovered and feeling much better. Troy isn't 100%, but it's because he hasn't been eating too well.

He was out running errands today (buying our Halloween costumes) so I took advantage of the empty house and cleaned the crap out of this place. This home is now germ free and only healthy people are invited to enter.

PS, the stomach flu miracle diet is Gatorade and tator tots. Hope that comes in handy to some of you at some point.

Somebody kill me please

Given that Troy and I like to share things, yesterday he shared his stomach flu with me - fun times! 2 people with butt pee and vomiting in a 600 sq ft 1 bath apartment was not a fun evening. I think I might have gained about .5 lbs over the weekend, but I'm sure after yesterday I'm back down to -10 lbs +.

I woke up at 5:30 this morning to get ready to catch my flight to Boston for work. After taking a shower and nearly passing out 3 times, I quickly realized that I couldn't make this 6 hr flight.

To put things in to prespective, the only other time I've cancelled a work event was when my ancient gas oven exploded in my face giving me 2 degree burns on my arms and hands. I spent the whole night in the ER hopped up on morphine and still tried to get on the flight the next night. My manager at the time forbade me from flying, but I would have been on that flight otherwise.

So, if you could kindly come over and put me out of my misery, I would greatly appreciate it. M'kay, thanks!

The Goonie gave me an early 18 week present!

This kid is such a giver I'm telling you! For my "almost 18 week" gift, the Goonie decided that after 5 days of feeling pretty good, that I needed to puke 3 times at work over the course of the day.

I'll fund your college fund kiddo, but I'm going to bring this up when you're about 5 and it is Christmas morning...

An update from the War on Sarah's face

This is Zitty McZitteron, reporting from the front lines of the War on Sarah's face.

As you may last remember, the "zitfedels" (the brutal terrorist organization) was leading organized bombing campaigns on the "foreheadal" and "chinal" regions of Sarah's face. There was slow progress being made by the allied camp, but there was little to be shown for it's efforts.

In the latest turn of events, it seems like the zitfedel bombing campaign has almost ceased. There are relatively few new bombing sights amongst the north and south regions of the face. However, there is a lot of collateral damage on certain areas which has resulted in a term that military experts refer to as "crater face". The scarring on the various neighborhoods are deep and will take a while to recover.

The good news is that "Operation MAC Foundation" has come in to play and at last Sarah has found a cover up that is pale enough for her super "tan" face. Operation MAC has been successful in the 2 days since it has been implemented. Everyone is hopeful that a full recovery can be achieved at some point.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In other news, I'm traveling again this week, so I will try to post a belly photo on Thursday or Friday. Hopefully it will be worth the wait and include a photo of Troy and my sweet Halloween costumes!

Don't tell me what to do baby book!

So in "Your Pregnancy Week by Week" it says that week 16 is the cutoff for sleeping and relaxing on your back. I never had a desire to sleep or relax on my back until I was told that I COULDN'T. As Troy put it "you don't like being told what to do Sarah".

I had a horrible night of sleep - I woke up at 2 am and couldn't get back to bed. In my mind I kept thinking "if I could lay on my back I could totally fall asleep right now". I start resenting my back for tempting me (I hear it whisper "just lay on me Sarah...what harm could it do"?). Annoying!

I got up around 6:30 since I couldn't sleep, and when I came back in our room after my shower Troy was all snuggled up with my pink polka dot body pillow. I wish I had taken a photo because they looked like the world's best friends.

I also saw a nutritionist today, and the answer first plan is whole milk (shudder) and olive oil with everything! Going forward if I have fruit I have to have a slice of cheese or a handful of nuts, or dip it in peanut butter. No longer can I enjoy the plain joy of an apple. I start the plan on Saturday (ish) and hopefully I start packing on some pounds and filling out my pants again!

Week 17 - saggy butts, more wieners & no weight gain

17 stats:Pounds gained to date: -10. The doc said the baby was growing well, and since I'm keeping fluids down, there is nothing to worry about yet.

The crappy part is that my pants are looking pretty nasty on me right now. I'm not in my maternity pants yet, and my normal pants hang off my butt (I didn't really have one to start with). To the left is a photo that Troy took for me today. Those pants used to make my booty looks slammin' cause they hugged in all the right places. Now...sad saggy booty.

Weeks until my next appointment: 3 weeks

How I am feeling (on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being "dear god, I feel like walking death"): .50. Emotionally I feel good, but I'm still puking and am pretty damn dizzy.

I had an appointment on Monday (Troy was working so my baby momma Anne went with me) and we had a surprise ultrasound! We'll know the gender for SURE in 3 weeks, but Anne, the doc, and I all saw a little dingle dangle. I've always thought "boy", and we thought we saw a wiener at our 13 week ultrasound as well.

17 week belly photo:

Awwww, Troy "fed" the baby last night

When I told Troy I was still having trouble keeping stuff down, he decided to take it on himself to "feed the baby". I was laying on the couch, and he stuck a granola bar in my belly button. I tried to explain that's not how it was done but I was laughing too hard as he was making munching noises. He then tried to help the Goonie wash it down with some water.

Also, since Troy was out of town this past week and I was so dizzy that I didn't want to be out a-bout too much, I was productive and got a ton of registering done! Well, I added stuff to a wishlist, but once we find out then gender, I can transfer it to a registry. The store where we are registering is about 30 minutes from us and like every store in SoCal, the customer services sucks and no one speaks English. I'd rather pysically be in the store for the least amount of time as possible, so I'm doing a ton online.

PLUS, I learned when we were registering for our wedding that Troy + price gun = bad news. When I went to the bathroom, he kept registering and registering, and registering. What, you didn't have a Lord of the Rings light sword, Ding Dongs, Doritos, and a flask (um, we don't drink) on YOUR wedding registry?

Week 16 - aka "is that a little belly"?

16 stats:Pounds gained to date: -8. Ru-ro

Weeks until my next appointment: 2 days. Troy is working on some show on Monday so my lesbian baby momma (long story) Anne is going with me! I fully expect to get a lecture on weight loss, but I'm hoping the doc will have a solution for me. I want to be healthy and look like a freaking pregnant woman already!

I think I might be anemic and am looking forward to my appointment on Monday. I'm constantly dizzy and have a lot of bruises on my legs that weren't there before (hey, I'm just like my sis now!). When I stand up, I have a lot of stars in front of my eyes.

I have noticed that my belly is a lot rounder, and my belly button is no longer a slit, but kind of opening up a bit.

How I am feeling (on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being "dear god, I feel like walking death"): today: .25. Thursday night, 1. Thursday was a real challenge for me, but I've been feeling pretty good since then.

Here is an awesome exchange that took place between me and a really shallow coworker:
Shallow coworker: OMG, you're so skinny!
Me: well I've been throwing up for 8 weeks so it was bound to happen.
Shallow coworker: how much weight have you gained?
Me: I'm still down 8 lbs because I can't keep that much food down.
Shallow coworker: OMG, I hate you.

Um...body image issues much lady?

Traveling this week - belly pix will be late!

I'm traveling this week and won't be back in LA until late late late Wednesday night. If I can stay awake long enough Thursday to post a belly photo I will. Right now I'm writing from a hotel in Philly waiting for my damn room service (for a $25 cheese pizza, you think they could move a little faster). If this food doesn't hurry up, I will soon have the distinction of puking in 3 cities (LA, Phoenix, and Philly!). The Goonie is a world traveler and equal opportunity puker.

My work stuff doesn't really begin until Tuesday, so I'm going to work from the hotel tomorrow and try and go out and see some of the sights. I've been to Philly about 10 times in the last 3 years, but I'm always confined to a conference room for work, and have never seen some of this gorgeous city!

The weekend was good - I had a work event that was at a spa/hotel in the mountains of Phoenix. Everyone had a spa credit, so I thought to myself "self, you should get a facial". Boy, bad choice! The facialist basically made me feel like a cross between a hobbit and a freak. I already felt bad about my skin, but crap after 60 minutes of "relaxation", I went back to my hotel room, sat in my bathtub reading US Weekly and crying for about 25 minutes. A truly proud pregnancy moment for me!

This weekend I also came up with an idea that will solve the world's financial issues AND keep a favorite TV show of mine fresh. Get this: in 2009, Jack Bauer is going to solve the financial crisis! Screw the Bush bailout plan that will take months to see if there is a positive effect (BTW, how are the tax rebates working George???), Jack will handle it in 24 hours, Chloe will help, and hopefully no one gets shot in the neck!

Cribs & other exciting news

I forgot to post last night, but we have ordered our crib! I found it online and fell in love with it. It converts to a toddler bed and a twin bed. It was 24% off, there was an additional $10 off coupon for new customers AND shipping was only $2.96. I got "such a deal"! It's being delievered tomorrow to Grandma & Grandpa C's house in B-town.

The place where we're going to register had the crib, but not in the color I wanted, so I just went ahead and ordered it. It has good safety ratings, and the brand was rated by Baby Bargains as "a deal for quality furniture". It's from http://www.overstock.com/ but you can also get it Babies R' Us and other over-priced baby conglomerates.

In other exciting news, we will get a look-see at the Goonie's "goods" on November 12th at 9 am! In 1 month and 2 days, we'll be able to know for sure if it is a Goonie or a Lady Goonie.

Week 15

15 stats:
Pounds gained to date: -5.5. I'm pretty sure I gained 2.5 lbs this week. Who-hoo! The Goonie is the size of a softball this week, but I'll tell you, I don't know where in the hell he/she is hanging out!

Weeks until my next appointment: 2 weeks, 2 days

How I am feeling (on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being "dear god, I feel like walking death"): .25. It's been a pretty good week so far!

So, I have to show off some awesome gifts I received for my birthday. The blue and brown bag is a diaper bag made out of recycled soda bottles. My super awesome friend Anne bought it for me (despite me telling her NOT to). It's freaking sweet.

The diaper bag on the right is a "man diaper" bag. That's right folks, that is a Chuck Norris diaper bag. We both love it, but Troy has called dibs on it already for when he has the Goonie. What the photo doesn't show is that the mustache is furry!!!! The back also says "Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits". A fantastic friend at work, Amit bought it for me (well, Troy). Thanks to everyone for the birthday wishes, cards, and gifts!

*Holy crazy formatting batman! Sorry about that!

Welcome to Week 14 - AKA bump be gone week

Week 14 stats:

Pounds gained to date: -8. I stepped on the scale tonight and saw 140 lbs and I believe "holy shit, fuck, damn" came out of my mouth. Unless you lose 15+ lbs, the doctor isn't worried. I'm not worried, but I feel like I'm hungry.

Weeks until my next appointment: 3 weeks, 2 days (same count as last week - I think I was off)

How I am feeling (on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being "dear god, I feel like walking death"): .25. I've thrown up a few times over the last few days, but the acne seems to be going away a little so I overall things are good.

PS. Where did my bump go?

Report from the front lines!

News bulletin: this is a special news report from the front line of the war on Sarah's face. As you might remember, about 9 weeks ago, the acne terrorist camp "Zitfidels" attacked the facial region to the north and south - identified on this map as the "forehead and chin area". Since then, they have spread to the east and west (cheeks and jaw line) in a series of carefully orchestrated attacks over the last few weeks.

The allied forces have had a weak defense with "Operation Erthromycin" that has left few Zitfidel causualities, but stings the eyes nightly.

This morning ladies and gentlemen, I am happy to announce that there seems to be some allied advancement on the northern side of the war. The Zitfidels seem to be slowly retreating from the "forehead" region, and the northern side of the face appears to be clearing. There is some concern that they are regrouping on the southern side of Sarah's chin to plan a new attack, but we're going to take this one day at a time people.

Until next time, this is Zitty McZiterton reporting from the war on Sarah's face.

A crazy PG side effect and a rant (well 2 rants)

Ok, so I've noticed in the last few weeks that my ears have a ton of wax in them - like way more than normal.

What's that? You're grossed out despite the fact that I promised this would be an honest blog about pregnancy? Well I can't hear you because my ears are full of WAX!

Rant 1: who in the fuck in this country is eating sweet relish? Seriously people! Whenever I'm out and about and want to enjoy relish with my meal, it's always sweet relish in the little packets of fury. I've never met a single person who likes sweet relish and yet I can't find a packet of dill to save my life. My freaking grocery store near my house has 15 kinds of sweet relish but NO dill. Blow me Ralphs Fresh Fare.

Rant 2: Hey Abercrombie, I get it. You sell perfume and cologne. Now can you please stop piping it out of your freaking tacky ass store so that I can walk by without dry heaving in to the planter in front of Macys? Does the overwhelming stench of donkey balls that you call perfume/cologne actually entice anyone to come in to the store and buy it? Oh wait, that's right, the people buying it are the same people who let their 6 year old daughters wear the thongs you created a few years ago. I forgot.

PS, Abercrombie, you're the anti-christ.

Potential wieners, Downs testing, and the kid from Lost!

Wow, busy and exciting day today! We went to do the NT scan for Down Syndrome today. Regardless of the results it won't change our decision to love this little Goonie, but it's best to be prepared and read up in case of chromosomal abnormalities.

The test involves a blood test and an ultrasound that measures the width of the babies' neck and checks for some evidence of a nose and bridge of the nose (between Troy and I, the kid will have a honker) . The ultrasound looked great and the doc said our baby is "beautiful". DUH! Now we just wait for the blood test results to come back in a few weeks and we're golden.

The nurse did a preliminary ultrasound before the doctor came in and we got to see the Goonie for about 5 minutes. While I'm sure it is gorgeous out of the womb, it looks a bit like Gollum from Lord of the Rings on the ultrasound screen! At one point the nurse asked if we wanted to know the gender (we said yes). She said she *thought* she saw a wee little wiener. At this fetal age, penises and vaginas look pretty similar, but both Troy and I saw a little wangle in the Goonie's dangle. At one point, we tried to get a better look between the legs and Goonie straight up put it's hands over it's crotch. Poor thing, a modest child will not do well in our house. The same house that celebrates "pants off o'clock" around 7 pm. We'll know for sure at 20 weeks (early Nov) if the Goonie is a Goonie, or a Lady Goonie.

Goonie also was jumping around and swatting at the area in front of it's face. We saw on the 3D ultrasound that the umbilical cord is right in FRONT of it's face so we think it's trying to swat it out of the way. Whenever the ultrasound tech pushed in with the ultrasound wand, Goonie would kick it's feet towards the top of my belly like "um, yah, if you could stop pushing on me that would be freaking great. And I'm going to need those TPS reports by 5:30. M'kay thanks". We saw some legs and while they looked long (like momma!), we didn't see any huge calves at this point.

For those of you who are reading this and don't know Troy and I in real life, you must be asking yourself "why does she keep mentioning calves"? Please see below for evidence that Troy was likely raised near a nuclear power plant. Those things aren't found in nature! We live in Los Angeles and 99% of the people who see them probably think Troy had his calves done. The fact that we could one day have a girl with those legs will pretty much guarantee us a little Olympian.

While seeing the kiddo was cool, the REALLY cool part came after the appointment! We were on the elevator and it stopped on another floor. The doors opened and right in front of us is the FREAKING KID FROM LOST WHO PLAYS WALTER!!!!! He ended up not getting on the elevator because him mom wasn't ready yet (whatever Walter, we saw the show - your mom died from cancer like 2 seasons ago). It's probably a good thing because Troy would have likely held him up against the wall until he spilled all the secrets from the show. But then a polar bear or a smoke monster would have probably eaten us.

Back in the car, Troy and I had a serious conversation about going back and offering to trade him our baby for the secrets of the show.

Holy shit balls, how did I get to week 13?

Week 13 stats:
Pounds gained to date: -4.50 lbs. That's right bitches, I gained .25 lbs!
Weeks until my next appointment: 3 weeks, 2 days
How I am feeling (on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being "dear god, I feel like walking death"): .25. Despite a wee bit of a set back yesterday morning (I won't go in to it, but it involved the expulsion of juice), it's been a great week so far!

Ok, so I was taking my belly photo (for you ERICA)

this week and I noticed something strange.

When I take it from one side, I have a wee bump. When I take it from the other side, it's gone.

T-Roy and I have discussed and determined I must be carrying the calves on my left side. That can be the only explanation for it! The photo to the left shows the bump (calves), the photo to the right shows that the bump is gone.

I know some of you have been worried about my eating because I can't keep much down and healthy food doesn't have much of a draw to me. But, I wanted to let you know that tonight I dined on legumes, wheat, dairy, and vegetables. It was wrapped in a lovely name that I call "the bean burrito" from Taco Bell. See, I can eat healthy stuff! Salads will come in time, I promise.

Speaking of healthy eating and weight gain, I've been told to gain between 25 and 30 lbs in total. I realize it's totally healthy for the baby, and that I'm 6 feet tall, but there is a small part of me that is secretly dreading the day I see "170+" on a scale. I started this at 148, so I'll be there at some point soon. I will never put the health of the Goonie at risk by NOT gaining weight. No one call CPS on me or anything!

I learned that the Goonie can start sucking it's thumb this week. A friend who is 4 days ahead of me also told me that they get fingerprints this week. So, our dreams of a fetal gang of pickpockets is sadly gone for the time being.

Thank you all for your comments, emails, and phone calls on Chip Chip. It really meant the world to Troy and I that 1) people don't think we're crazy for mourning a squirrel and 2) that you also seemed to feel our pain.

Enjoy your week everyone! I hope it is glorious.

PS, when I type this post, there are spaces and paragraphs. When I put it on the interwebs, they disappear. It's magic!

Rest in peace Chip Chip

Troy called and little Chip Chip will be put to sleep today. His legs are paralyzed and he won't recover. Troy was hoping to build a little wheelchair or something. I did a Google search for "handicapped Squirrel" and "Squirrel wheelchair" but couldn't find any plans.

He fought bravely. To the right is how I picture him in the last few days.

So, here is an ode to Chip Chip from those who loved him:



Chip Chip, you brought joy to our lives
You showed us your love, and you showed us your might
We love you even though you liked to chew on the gutters at night
You made us laugh as you jumped from tree to tree
I think I laughed so hard once I had to pee.
Even though you ate my ONLY ripe orange last year, I couldn't stay made at you
Troy and I will miss you - you were one of the good few.

I'm being no means a professional poet, but you have to admit - the above is freaking gold.

Chip Chip update

All, thanks for your prayers and concerns about Chip Chip, our poor little squirrel friend.

Troy called the clinic on Saturday and they said his back legs might be paralyzed. They're waiting until today or tomorrow to check on his progress and determine next steps. If he's not paralyzed, they'll be able to rehabilitate him. If he is, they're going to have to put him to sleep.

Hearing about the possibility of putting him to sleep, made me think about what squirrel heaven would be like. Clearly, it's full of trees to climb and jump on, no cats, fresh tomatoes and strawberries everywhere, and of course 1,000 Troy's who will sit on the stairs, feed you peanuts, and "talk" to you for about 10 minutes about your day. Yep, Troy knows squirrel. You weren't aware?

I'm going to be an attention whore for a bit

All, I'm going to be an attention whore for a second. I have to show off what my amazing friend Jennifer sent me in the mail:

She made everything (I picked out the animals), and she surprised me with the booties and hat. The animals are for the Goonie's eventual nursery. I need naming help for all the animals, so please feel free to submit a comment with a name suggestion!

The package couldn't have come at a better time. We got home tonight after Troy's doctor's appointment, and were getting ready to sit down and enjoy our dinner from the world's greatest sandwich place when I hear Troy scream and run out of the apartment.

A cat that belongs to our crazy neighbor Mary (who has like 19 cats) was attacking Chip Chip. Chip Chip is the squirrel who lives in the tree near our front door. Chip Chip has been a part of our Los Angeles life since we moved here - we even tried to get him in our Christmas card photo one year.

He loves to sit on the front stairs and wait for Troy to feed him peanuts (non-salted because diabetes and high sodium are already an issue in the US). He also loves to hang out in our garden and watch me tend to the plants. A few times I've been digging in the garden and will look over and see Chip Chip watching me and digging his own hole. He likes to plant peanuts amongst our tomato plants, and he loves to take a bite out of the juiciest tomato in the garden.

We drove Chip Chip in a cardboard box up to Malibu during rush hour to an animal sanctuary. We're hoping he's going to be ok. We're tempted to send the sanctuary a photo of Troy and I, and a ripe tomato to keep near his bedside. Please keep Chip Chip in your thoughts and prayers!

Happy 12 week birthday Goonie!

Week 12 stats:

Pounds gained to date: -4.75 lbs

Weeks until my next appointment: 4 weeks, 2 days

How I am feeling (on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being "dear god, I feel like walking death"): .75. I've been throwing up a lot, but seeing the Goonie today on the ultrasound was so awesome!

We went to the doctor today and got an awesome ultrasound! The new doctor is great, and we got to see the Goonie for about 5 minutes while she tried to get a great shot for a photo. We have one photo of Goonster doing a "fist pump", and another where it kept showing us it's butt/crossing it's legs. Very cute! Here is the best photo she got. Much clearer than the 7 week one where it just looked like a baby panda.

Grossest thing ever (don't read if squeamish)

Ok, so you know I've been puking a lot and you know I'm rocking some SWEET acne. Well today, the two worlds of awesomeness collided.

I was at work late tonight because of an event and thought I was going to avoid puking. Nope, as soon as I got home I had to let is loose. After that super sweet event, I looked in the mirror and blood was streaming down my face towards my eye.

I inspected it more closely and realized that I puked SO hard that I caused a zit to start bleeding. Troy saw the aftermath - it was brutal.

I warned you that it was gross and you kept reading. You have no one but yourself to blame! I promise this will be an honest blog about pregnancy. We don't all look like Angelina people.

And Erica, the belly photo will come tomorrow my dear. I was occupied last night by a fantastic book and had to be at work late tonight. Plus we have our 12 week appointment tomorrow and it will just be easier to post everything all at once.

Please ignore my last post. =(

The whole "I haven't puked since XXXX" bragging is no longer. Oy vey, it's ok!

The icky news is that I think the Goonie has given me a cavity. I'm constantly sucking on Jolly Ranchers for the nausea and the 1-4 times a day of throwing up can't be helping my tooth enamel...

I go to the dentist next Wednesday, so I hope it's good news. Back in 1998 I had a cavity filled without any pain medication. I can do it again, but would prefer not to if the cavity is deep.

Speaking of cavities, am I the only one who was brainwashed by the public school system in to thinking this is what an actual cavity looks like?

No puking since Wednesday night!

Apparently the magic combo to keeping my food down is to eat pancakes for dinner while watching Wipeout on Tivo.

If you haven't seen Wipeout, it's the American version of MXP which is an Asian (Japanese?) game show where people do hilarious things that often result in a direct hit to the balls. So, apparently pancakes and laughing my ass off is the magic formula!

I hope everyone has a fantastic weekend! I'm going to be watching 4 year olds play soccer tomorrow (I'm already giggling at the thought of it) and then having brunch with a few friends.

Week 11

Week 11 stats:Pounds gained to date: -2 lbs

Weeks until my next appointment: 1 week, 1 day
How I am feeling (on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being "dear god, I feel like walking death"): .5. Even with the throwing up, this week is starting off much better than last week!

My only pregnancy complaint

I bet you think it's about puking right? Nope, that I can handle! It's not the puking, it's not the invasive doctor appointments, or even the food aversions -- it's the freaking ACNE!

My face is so broken out that I feel 13. And a lovely side effect of the pregnancy acne is that after being huge, red, and nasty for about a week, the "blemishes" (that word sounds too nice for what they are) turn black. Yes, black. So, not only do I look like a topographical map of the Cascade Mountain range, but I'm also announcing to the world that I'm slowly rotting from the inside starting on my face.

I went to a dermatologist last week for some help. Below is a transcript of the appointment (I mean, as far as I can remember):

Dermatologist: yes, I can see why you're frustrated Sarah, those are some red marks! But, I can't prescribe anything in the pill form for you.
Sarah: Ok, is there anything you can give me that will help?
Dermatologist: Yes, but there are some side effects...
Sarah: Like it will hurt my baby?
Dermatologist: No, worse!
Sarah: Worse that hurting my baby? What could it be doc?
Dermatologist: I don't know how to say this, so I'll have to say it in medical terms. The only topical cream that I can give you smells like Big Foot's nuts.
Sarah: (look of horror)
Dermatologist: And even though it stinks and makes your face look like you're wearing a beard of bees, it might not help in the end.
Sarah: so, you can write me a prescription for that today? Thanks

That is pretty much how I remember the appointment going. The doctor might have a slightly different point of view though...

The nastiest thing ever

I'm at work late for a recruiting event and felt the Goonie again getting angry. I ran to a bathroom I never use because it's on a different floor. I forgot that the toilets in there are automatic flush, and there some um..."splash back" with auto flush toilets. For fark's sake!

I 100% blame this on the deli by my work being out of baked potatoes and forcing my hand at ordering minestrone. Suck it Courtyard Cafe! I'm glad Subway is going in next to you and will likely run you out of business. Guess you shouldn't have been out of baked potatoes huh? Assholes.

Heart rate & blood work update

I had a doctor's appointment today with my old doc. I scheduled it weeks ago before I realized I hated her office. I decided to keep it cause, well...cause!

We went over my bloodwork from a few weeks ago and I'm proud to say that I'm not starting this pregnancy out anemic! I also don't have syphilis, so that is a HUGE load off of my mind...=D

The best part about keeping the appointment was that we got to hear the heartbeat on the doppler! She said it was around 160 which is perfect for me being 11 weeks. At my 7 week appointment it was around 134, so the Goonie is going strong. I thought I heard a little wheezing in the breathing, so Troy will have to show the Goonie when it's born how to use an inhaler...=D

While we were waiting 45 freaking minutes for the doctor, we came up with names for a boy or girl. For a boy, we've chosen "Dragon Hawk", and for a lady Goonie, we're going with "Troyina". Not sure about a middle name for Troyina yet, but Dragon is the first name and Hawk is the middle name.

I realize these might seem a little weird to all of you, but we're in Los Angeles the land of crazy names!*

Also, I'm stuck at work until about 10 pm tonight, so I'll post my 11 week belly photo tomorrow. Cause I know you're all at the edge of your freaking seats right now.

*For anyone who thinks I'm serious about these names needs to learn to read sarcasm!

The cutest thing ever

So I forgot to post this last week, but it's so cute, YOU too might puke a rainbow.

I was on my way over to my super amazing friend Anne's house for dinner, and I got a phone call from her house. It was her (almost) 5 year old Aidan. He wanted to know if my baby would rather watch Diego or Toy Story II. He had heard earlier from his mom that my baby can see and hear, but can't see outside my tummy. He thought it was sad for the baby to not be able to watch the movie with us.

Are you? Are you puking a rainbow yet? Isn't that seriously adorable?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And a special shout out to my favoritest niece Ashlyn Grace who turns 2 today! Special thanks to all of you who read this blog who said prayers for Ashy when she was a little baby. She had to have heart surgery around 2 months old and it was a very scary time. I'm pleased to announce that you couldn't tell that this little girl has ever had a cold let alone open heart surgery! She's a healthy little spitfire who brings joy to everyone she meets. I love you Ash!:::

Two more things ruined for me now

To set the scene: (Target, West Hollywood, 9:15 am. Our subject is wandering around the aisle with her favorite Jamba Juice in hand)

So there I am in the Target toiletries section, and I could feel the Goonie getting ANGRY. I ran to the bathroom and proceeded to puke for a good 5 min. To be clear, a Jamba Juice is $4.70. WTF Goonie, momma is cheap!

I was feeling very pathetic and sorry for myself so I sent Troy a pitiful text: "babe, I just puked up my Jamba Juice at Target. That was a special kind of nasty". His response: "Sorry boo, you really did puke a rainbow". Puking a rainbow is one of my favorite terms EVER to describe something cute. So, Troy is right, I finally made my favorite saying true.

The rest of the day I felt icky, but to avoid Troy's wrath when he got home from work (joke), I still managed to clean the house. I have a new system: lay on the couch like a whiny mess and watch TV. At commercial I have to get up and clean something. It takes forever to do dishes or vacuum, but it keeps me from getting too sick. Well...that and the chicken corn dogs and ice cream sandwiches I had for lunch...

Goonie, your mom is a GENIUS!

So, call me Columbo - I've figured it out. Nights that I take 2 Tylenol PM (totally safe according to my OB), I wake up feeling good and have a puke free day. Nights that I go "natural" and don't take any PM, I wake up feeling pukey and gross.

So, apparently if I drug my way through the first trimester, I'll be golden. So that's my plan.

Want to see the Goonie?

Ok, so using 2 bad photos of Troy and I, I uploaded them to http://www.makemebabies.com/. Here is the Goonie:

Crappy news from my dad

My dad just called and said that he has to get his other leg amputated. This farking blows. The good news is that he can wait until January until Troy and I are back home. I can stay with mom while he is in the hospital. Since I'm working from home anyway, it doesn't matter WHICH home I'm working from!

In a tribute to my dad's awesome spirit, here is one of my favorite photos of him taken with him wearing a shirt that I got him for Christmas. If the photo is too small it says "I'm just in it for the parking".

Love you Pops!

Week 10 has not started off well

Dear Goonie,

You're kicking my ass. Please stop.

Regards,
Momma

Happy 10th week Goonie!

:::sorry in advance for the formatting on this post. I can't seem to fix it:::

I can't believe it's been 7 weeks and 1 day since we found out that we had been blessed with the Goonie. Time has totally flown!

Today the Goonie turns 10 weeks old. He/she is doing super exciting things like finally losing its tail, producing 250,000 neurons in its brain every minute, and being the size of a small plum. It's a tough job getting smart and being the size of a fruit! The Goonster also is starting to resemble a baby more than an extra from Aliens vs. Predator.

Week 10 stats:
Pounds gained to date: still down -1 lbs (this is Los Angeles everyone. No baby can make ME fat!)

Weeks until my next appointment: 2 weeks, 2 days

How I am feeling (on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being "dear god, I feel like walking death"): 1-ish. I've had a few days of 3+ puking episodes, but I take it all in stride. In a sick way I almost welcome it because it's a sign that all is right with the Goonster. I was feeling so good for so long that I was always a wee bit freaked out. My awesome friend Anne said that I was probably feeling so sick this week because the baby must be going through calf development. If you've seen Troy's freak-calves, it's totally true.

At the photo up above you can start to see a mini bump. It's small, but it's there! I had a dream last night where I woke up today and got HUGE overnight. I was super scared because my boss and other people at work don't know yet so I kept thinking "how on earth will I cover this up"?

Gooniemeister is also creating a disorder on my face that I think is medically referred to as "pizza face". I went to a dermatologist today and she gave me some pregnancy safe stuff that should hopefully clear up my hideousness fairly soon. A bonus of going to this dermatologist is that the main guy (Dr. Ray) from Dr. 90201 on the E channel has his office on the same floor as my doctor. I saw him this am and I have to say - the camera adds about 4 feet, and they must have the "look butch" filter set to "high". This dude was short and super girly looking. He was so small that I almost put him in my purse and ran away. Cause in a few months, the Goonie will need a playmate it's own size!

When god made awesome husbands, he broke the mold for Troy

First, Troy just all around rocks. Like really rocks. He's been wonderful about helping me out if I'm feeling icky, etc. Since in our 4 years of marriage I rarely ask for help even if I feel like a bucket of poo, this is a new experience for both of us. When I had 2nd degree burns on my hands and arms I refused all help.

One of my bestest friends and former roommate Megan, nicknamed Troy "Super boyfriend", "Super fiance" and "Super husband" during the various stages of Troy and my relationship. She hit the nail on the freaking head.

Today he was bored and took a walk up to the mall. During his mall time, he received the following text conversation:

Whiny PG lady: "Hey babe, will you bring me a smoothie from Coral Tree Cafe at the food court? The one with peaches".
Whiny PG lady: "Oh, and some of their vegetable soup please".
Super husband: "Of course sweetie".
Super husband: "They don't have the smoothies".
(insert me crying on the couch)
Super husband: "How about Pinkberry"?
Whiny PG lady: "Ohhhhhh, yay! The Pinkberry smoothie".

I forgot to tell Troy there is an actual smoothie CALLED the Pinkberry smoothie, so bless his heart why he tried to figure that one out.









If you look closely, you can see his halo.

UPDATE (6:36 pm): why he's even more awesome. After lugging home the veggie soup, he didn't even question the fact that I only wanted the broth...

I did it!

I did it. They said it couldn't be done. No one believed I was capable of it...

I freaking took a nap today! I'm a terrible sleeper and ordinarily can't nap if you paid me. After getting up around 3 am today and staying awake until 5:15 am, I guess my body finally waved the white flag and I gave in.

Then I woke up and had a half of a Pop Tart. So, pretty much the best day ever.

UPDATE (10 pm): I take it back. Worst day ever. I puked 4 times and felt sicker than I ever have before. God bless Troy for taking care of me and being so patient.

This blog has been puke free for 36+ hours

Hell yah, that's what we call a "streak"! After puking 3 times on Wednesday, 36 hours puke free rocks. We went and saw Tropic Thunder on Wednesday night. Without being too graphic, I'll just say that I won't be enjoying movie popcorn again for quite a while. For the record, the movie was hilarious and in no way is my fear of popcorn derived from the film.

I volunteer for Big Sisters Little Sisters, and yesterday Troy and I took my Little to Disneyland for her birthday. She brought her biological little sister along. I have to say even at 9 weeks pregnant and feeling a little icky, I am about 10 times faster than those girls.

My little sister (17) is about 5'9 and probably 210 pounds. Her sister (13) is 5'3 and 15o pounds which is 3-4 pounds MORE than me and I'm 6'. Oy vey they are very heavy and LAZY girls, but as Troy kept reminding me, it's a product of their environment and it's not their fault. We did our best to encourage healthy eating habits yesterday, and hopefully the walk did them well.

We went on our of our fav rides: Buzz Lightyear. You get a laser blaster and try to score points by shooting targets. Troy always kicks my ass. Below is a photo taken during the ride. Sadly, despite my aggressive warrior face, I lost. =(

Since I had to sit out most of the rides, Troy was an angel and stood in line with the girls all day. These girls are VERY sweet, but extremely dim. Troy is a patient man and I love him for it!

Week 9 - there is some crazy shit goin' on up in here!

This week The Goonie is the sign of a green olive. His/her arms and legs are growing longer, and eyelids are developing. I'm not going to lie, it looks freaking creepy from the photos online I have seen. I know it's my kid and all, but ewwwww...

Week 9 stats:

Pounds gained to date: -1 lbs (who knew that throwing up makes you lose weight. Does the fashion industry know about this????)
Weeks until my next appointment: 3 weeks, 2 days
How I am feeling (on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being "dear god, I feel like walking death"): .75-1. The puking is getting to me a bit, but I refuse to let it break me!

A new nightime routine

Brush teeth? Check!
Wash face? Check!
Take prenatal vitamin and some sort of safe sleep aid? Check!
Puke in toilet around 10 pm? Check!

For the past three nights I've thrown up around 10 pm. I don't mind it because I feel a ton better afterwards. Last night I was hanging out in bed watching TV waiting to puke. I really needed to because I was feeling so icky. I ran out of the bedroom and announced to Troy that "it was time". He commented that "he has never known anyone who was so excited to puke". I did my business and then went to bed and slept like an angel.

Mary Kate Olson, I get it now.

Troy = best husband ever

I take back all the "your baby thinks you're an asshole" jokes (which were just teasing anyway. No need to send me another email on that DAD). Guess what my awesome husband is making me for dinner tonight? Pancakes, mashed potatoes, and bacon. Yep, divine.

After hurling twice yesterday, I'm eating whatever the hell sounds good to me. If only he could make pancakes out of mashed potatoes...

:::runs off to secret food lab to investigate:::

Update (6:51 pm). Best dinner ever:

My streak is over

It was bound to happen, I had it easy for too long. I finally puked this morning. Dammit.

It's my own damn fault, and I set myself up for failure. We took my interns out last night for their farewell event, and I wasn't smart about eating properly. I didn't like my dinner, and forgot to pack extra snacks in my purse. After dinner we went to a karaoke place with the undergrad interns and I was locked in a hot and sweaty room for 3 hours singing my heart out. I was trying to stay hydrated with water, but I could only drink so much.

After leaving the bar at 1:15 am, I knew I was screwed. My stomach was pissed and I knew I was in for it. I fought the nausea for a bit, but it found me this morning around 10:15 am at work. Thankfully the bathroom was empty, because I am not a "pretty puker". When I puke it sounds like a guttural tribal song from the Amazon.

The good news is I feel better now!

Week 8 - it's a fetus party up in here!

Happy birthday to the Goonie who turns 8 weeks today! So what did you do this week? Cause I created ears, toes, and fingers. Yep, I've been busy!

Anyhoo, before I show off the belly pix, I thought you all would like to see my harvest from today. They are all organic heirloom tomatoes: Pineapple (big ones), Green Zebra, Mortgage Lifter, and paste tomatoes.

We're enjoying them with our homegrown basil, and really yummy buffalo mozzarella from Costco. A few of these are going to work, but the rest are headed to the freezer to make sauce at some point.

Now for the obligatory belly shot: tada! that is 50% Goonie, and 50% gnocchi. Mmm...gnocchi.

A new part of my weekly post: the stats.

Pounds gained to date: .5 lbs

Weeks until my next appointment: 4

How I am feeling (on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being "dear god, I feel like walking death"): .25. Thanks mom for the great healthy pregnancy genes! This totally makes up for the knobby knees and small boobs.

Until next time!