...I am at the helm of a steamroller, barreling towards my terrified and shaking Medela Pump. The pump puts his arms up (I guess that would be the tubing?) screaming "Please no! Please be kind, don't squish me"!
I am cold-hearted and the pleas for leniency don't sway me. I continue on with a maniacal grin on my face. I get closer and closer and an evil laughter begins to escape from my mouth. At this point, the pump is crying - leaking the milk that I just pumped - and telling me to consider his family. I call him a liar; pumps are machine and don't have family. Besides, his demise means I have more time with MY family.
My mind is made up, and I refuse to bend. I push the accelerator down to the floor (do steamrollers have accelerators??), and roll over the pump as he lets out a sickening scream. The pump is no more, and I am free.
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8 comments:
I take it that your pumping days are over?
No ma'am - still pumping, but I dream of the days when I'll be done!
::runs into dream and puts my screaming pump down next to yours and runs back out::
As necessary as that thing is, I hate it! I can't wait to be able to put it away.
p.s. the word verification today is "dumie". Are you trying to tell me something??? ;)
I feel your pain. I dream of blowing mine up.
do you have a hands free bra??
your dream makes me giggle
The day I said goodbye to that pump was the best day EVER! Stupid pumps.
You said it!
LOL!
Pumping Sucks!
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